To my close, personal friend, Polly

My Dear, Dear Friend, Polly,

The Zsa Zsa has heard you have had a blessed event and the Zsa Zsa would like to extend warm wishes to you and your little brats brood!

Why Dah-ling, I didn’t even know you were …you know…on the nest, as we politely say. And don’t you worry, Dear. The Zsa Zsa is sure your intended will do the right thing. I wouldn’t believe a word of what everyone says about him being a “stud” and a “dog.” He’ll get around to settling down and making you an honest little whore bitch. Someday.

And how are those filthy darling little beasts puppies? The Zsa Zsa was just ecstatic to find out that they are all as fit and healthy as can be expected when the mother is so trashy healthy.

At least you have my close male relative, The Bedford, living with you to provide your offspring with an example of good breeding and refinement. Though they may never attain the level of superiority The Bedford has attained, they cannot help but benefit from his leadership qualities, in spite of their maternity.

The Zsa Zsa does wish you well, Dah-ling, as well as the Zsa Zsa has ever wished you when we lived together in the peace and harmony that can only be found in the presence of the Zsa Zsa.

You are like a sister to me, you little bitch.

Love, the Zsa Zsa

Editor's Note: Zsa Zsa doesn't like it to get around that Bedford is her son and that she lost custody of him to his father. She claims she is too young to have had puppies. We just let her live in her little fantasy world.

Polly's "intended" is actually Milwin Legend of Bayshore.

Puppy pictures will be forthcoming, since Ms. Zsa Zsa may be on disciplinary leave.