I have such news!

Guess what, Dah-lings!?

The Zsa Zsa has agreed to meet a prospective…shall we say, amore!

Of course, The Zsa Zsa is only barely of age to participate in such an endeavor and The Zsa Zsa, being so shy and retiring, must admit to be slightly horney twitterpated. Oh, yes! The Zsa Zsa is twitterpated!

So we will travel to the farthest reaches of Shenandoah County where there just happens to be the studmuffin gentledog who has caught the eye of the Zsa Zsa. And who knows: a soft spring breeze, a new moon, a little Sinatra on the stereo…and The Zsa Zsa may have an announcement…

But The Zsa Zsa gets ahead of Herselfness…

(You don’t think That Woman was smart enough to find someone worthy of The Zsa Zsa, do you? NOOOOO…Thank goodness for Mamma K, who I suppose had nothing to do since all she does all day is watch soap operas or something. She claims her leg is broken, which, of course, is no excuse for the total cease of regular pilgrimages to do homage to The Zsa Zsa.)

Note to my dear, dear friend Polly: Rumor has it one of your little brats puppies, Liam, had something to do with the attempted murder the maiming the “accident” that caused Mamma K to fall (Mamma K says it was the wet grass and the hillside, but The Zsa Zsa knows she’s just being polite). I’m sure the rest of your litter will somehow manage not to do too much damage to anyone. One juvenile delinquent isn’t so bad, Dah-ling. Though you can’t help but notice that blood does tell, Dah-ling.